Jarna's Infallible Law of...Vanity

Oprah says, “A healthy dose of vanity leads to a comfortable level of self-esteem.” I’m not an Oprah quoter and I have my own thoughts about the Oprah-worship I see going on but I must agree. A bit of vanity does the body good.

I must clarify that there is a difference between narcissism and vanity. I think narcissism is a terrible thing; on the other hand, Narcissists live like nothing exists but their happiness and treat others like ladders leading to the same.

The word narcissism comes from a Greek tale of a handsome boy who was so in love with himself that he would sit on the bank of a river staring at his reflection all day long until he eventually fell in and drowned.

 In each of my rants, I touch a bit on vanity-whether overtly or covertly-but it’s because I think it’s not so much of a bad thing.

Here are my rules on the subject:

1. Here a little, there a little.

The key to pulling it off is in the dosage. It’s a slippery slope. A lot of vanity becomes narcissism but in small doses here and there...perfect.

 2. It’s not gender specific. 

I’m being gender-neutral because I think guys should cultivate just a bit as well. Value yourself as highly as women do and don’t give yourself away to just anybody for any reason.

3. Apply to works-in-progress

It works well with flaws. It doesn’t mean that you have to be absolutely perfect to sprinkle a little vanity here and there. It means that you recognise your adjustable issues and are working to fix them while appreciating the un-fixable ones.

4. Subject to criticism.

If you shy away from criticism and attention, this is not for you. With a healthy dose of vanity comes all manner of dirty remarks all referring to you thinking you’re better than everybody else. Pay them no mind. In a bowl of apples the orange will always stand out.

5.   Not half and half.

This can’t work if you only work on the physical. We hear all the time that ugly people on the inside are ugly outside and blah blah blah (personally, I think that’s rubbish) but you can’t have a poor self-image and keep dolling  up the outside.

Don't go out trampling on people and calling it self-esteem though.

That said, go on and work toward your comfortable level of self-esteem!