Can Guys and Girls Be Just Friends?

 An age-old question. Various civilisations, cultures and religions have enforced strict rules to govern the relationships between men and woman and often barring even platonic friendships. Times have changed (several times over) but now ages later are we any closer to the answer? I have a split opinion; I say yes and no.
 

Here’s why I say no: Hasn’t time and numerous bad experiences taught us enough? A part of me asks, “After you stick your fingers in fire once (twice, if you’re special) are you really willing to try again for confirmation? Will you not quit until your arm is a mangled mess?”

As far as I know, I have never been burned by such a situation but it’s as logical as the law of gravity.

Take for example two female friends-best friends. Your choice of this girl as a best friend means that out of all the female and male friends you have, this one is your favourite.  Maybe because, she listens best, talks best, comforts best, understands best—basically everything you need in a friend, best. Isn’t it only natural that if this girl were a guy, you would be completely smitten with him? 

Ok, so the subject is not about best friends, you say, the question pertains to ‘just friends.’ Well how about this: Isn’t that how every timeless relationship starts? In my experience, relationships that start out hot and heavy don’t last because they were not designed for durability. Those which last for ages through trials, rumours, distance and troubles start off as friendships; casual conversations here and there sprinkled with patient understanding. That friendship is the glue keeping that friendship alive through the rough patches and it is what will become comfortable companionship in old age. It’s only logical that two very good friends could grow to become more...warts and all. So can guys and girls be ‘just friends’? One part of me says no.

The other part says of course, why not?

Try counting the number of platonic friendships you have with the opposite sex? That should be a good enough reason, just as you don’t want to be trapped aboard a sinking ship with all of them; you don’t want a relationship- sexual or otherwise- with all of them.

Count the number of significant and close friends you have of the opposite sex. You thought of these persons for a reason, they’re special to you because they offer you something that many others do not or are unable to.

Here’s another apt rhetoric to help you understand: do you use heels for sporting events; jeans for formal events? Clearly not. Does that mean that you don’t still need your jeans and heels? Clearly not. They each serve a different purpose in your life. I purport that we can have close friends of the opposite sex because that’s what we want: close friends of the OPPOSITE sex.

Perpetuating that those co-ed friendships are bound to end in relationships are somewhat offensive to me. Are we likening ourselves unto rabbits, dogs and chickens which see no difference in inter-personal relationships besides male/female? 

Sometimes after years of friendship with someone of the opposite sex you‘ve seen enough to not want a relationship with that person. You’ve seen him/her on the very worst diarrhoea days and just that can act as the brick wall preventing the friendship from evolving into anything else. 

My reasons for believing that males and females can be just friends are reasons enough to say that they can’t. And the reverse is true.

So, Can they? The jury may be out on that one.