"My Time Doesn't Belong To You"

What is it about a time-conscious individual that offends most people? I wish I knew the answer. I was hoping you knew.

In recent times, I’ve found myself being offended very often and heavily by this issue of time consciousness. From my social interactions...and lack of it...I realise that it’s more of an issue to me than it is to most. Many a bridge has been burnt because of time - much to the surprise and/or confusion of others. 

While someone else might be baffled by the level of my upset at having my time wasted, I’m equally mystified by someone other than myself attempting to directly or indirectly spend my time on my behalf.

The reason is so simple to me: what I spend my time on is a reflection of who I am and what I value.

I feel like what I do with my time, whether it’s used to create something that will change the world, or lie around doing nothing; it should be left up to me and not somebody else. By telling me to be ready for 3pm on Monday, I have made decisions that facilitate you. I have put other things aside and allowed you to control the time it takes for me to be ready for 3pm. To me, that shows what I choose to value for that period of MY life.

 In my warped mind, someone who wastes a minute of my time is in gross violation of my person. It’s direct disrespect to me.

If I’m told to be some place for eight, I will do everything to be there on time, chance are, I’ll probably get there before the other person. That means I had to stop whatever I was doing, put this meeting before anything else I could’ve been doing and expend energy and resources into getting there on time. The way I see it, both our time is important and must be respected.

What you choose to do with your time is entirely up to you but I don’t allow for my time to be taken for granted. When you expect me to wait for you for half an hour (as if!) because you couldn’t bother to get in the shower on time, I feel like you don’t respect what I had to do to get there therefore you’re not worth any part of me. No, not even my time.

Looking at this, I see how somebody could say that this is too petty an issue to be taken so seriously but I think more people should think that way. Had it not been for this guy who kept me waiting unimaginable hours of my precious life, I would probably be a different person.

Imagine being invited to events and being so excited and rushing to get ready and to make everything perfect. Then realising that in your excitement you’re an hour early. You’re now forced to sit still and wait out this hour. As time draws nearer, you refresh things, make sure that the perfume is still there and the skin is still flawless. Then with nary a word of warning, having to sit there wilting like a flower in the sun for another ninety minutes. You‘re naturally pissed off but you’re dressed and still excited so you finally call just to hear, “Hey, I didn’t realise the time. I have to go there and do this and then I’m gonna shower ...”

Eventually, this guy turns up three hours later...

That was me aeons ago. And that bitter lesson (repeated several times until it stuck) changed me, for the better I think.

I essentially devalued myself by allowing my time to be wasted so negligently, These are hours, I will desperately wish I had when my time comes to meet my maker...or when I’m running late for something important.

Which brings me to this point: no matter how much a planner plans, shit happens. People are late, things pop up, clocks display wrong times, people accidentally fall asleep and time gets away. Shit happens.

One can usually tell when something is going awry and have the intelligence to say to the other person well in advance what’s going on. There’s no way a planned event will ‘pop up’ and throw off your schedule. You know that this other things may require your attention/attendance, so plan accordingly.

It makes a world of difference when someone has the decency to let me know that this has come up, or may come up. That means that I can plan my time accordingly.

It drives me up the wall to be waiting for someone and be told way too late that something has happened. One too many times means I’m getting my matches- bye bye bridge!

Males as well as females should see their time as precious. It doesn’t matter that you were not doing anything anyway. People value you based on the price you put on yourself. That includes your time.

So what is it about a time-conscious individual that offends most people? I guess it’s the level of control and poise it shows to someone who has none.