You Belong To Us

I found myself being entirely so surprised just about four months ago when my eyes were opened to something that may have existed forever but I had never noticed before.

Colour me inattentive but the idea of overseas-based Dominicans demonstrating apathy to things relating to their homeland blows my mind.

This is the subject of my rant today: an apathetic Dominican Diaspora; Dominicans who live overseas and who lack any feeling, emotion, interest or concern for matters relating to the place of their birth.

Ok, you may have just shrugged and rolled your eyes wondering why such a condition bothers me.

I know scores of Dominicans who live overseas and that number is divided into several sub-categories, including mainly:

There are those who check local news regularly and want to know the happenings in real time. They may or may not have family left here and demonstrate real interest and support in the work which forges on ahead here. They claim that no matter how far away or how long they stay away, they will always be Dominican.

There are also those who show less active interest for varying reasons but who will still stop when they hear something or ask questions. They will have reminders of home in their new life and speak fondly of their younger days in the Nature Isle.

Then there are those who, from the moment they set foot on foreign soil purge their minds of any reminder of their ‘small, backward country and ignorant people.’

I speak of and to the latter.

I have just one question, why?

Why are you so excited to claim someone else’s home as your own? Why do you feel that different automatically means better? Why do you feel it necessary to choose, and why not choose something that is wholly yours by default?

Is it because you are ashamed? I think that may be the main reason. I can hear it in their volume, in the words they choose to respond to questions. I can hear it in their eager statements to disassociate themselves from the West Indies. Before long, they become those people who seek to poke fun at their friends visiting from the islands. I can still identify them; they are still asking silly questions and making ignorant statements following the patterns of those who genuinely don’t know any better. 

“How do you guys get around? Walk?!"
"OMG, a yogurt is almost $3?!"
"Businesses are closed on Sundays?!”

They are those who will read new stories online and comment sentiments like, “That’s why the Caribbean will always be backward. Look at [insert country here] and [insert country here]. They're so much better.”

Some feel no shame but are just genuinely unaffected by the happenings in the land that birthed them, educated them, fed them and made them into people with an ingrained sense of productivity and humility. They forget that it was in this part of the world that they learned to improvise and stretch a dollar. It was here that their bodies were strengthened for the trials ahead with bananas, coconuts, ground provisions and mangoes. Now, they turn up their noses at people who wake up early and put their hands and backs to work toiling under the Caribbean sun.

How convenient it is for them to forget when it is that very background that makes them able to work three jobs just to hold their heads above water.

How can you hear of the occasional misdeed in Dominica and feel like that is no longer your concern? Don’t you have family and interests here? Are you not concerned that the people affected are the shopkeepers who gave you extra sweets as a child? These are people with whom you went to school and church and who form policies and make decisions that affect your home. At the very least, are you just ungrateful?

People are working their entire lives to vacation three weeks here and you grew up here. People visit and end up moving here yet you turn your back as if to say those who chose to stay can rot here for all you care.

That’s fine because if, God forbid, you are ever chewed up and spit out, you will still be welcomed here. We, who chose to stay here, still appreciate our own and we will never turn our backs.

Why are you ashamed or feel the right to be unaffected? How easily you forget that no matter how long you stay in that land and no matter how easily you fool others with your accent and international mannerisms, you will always be a second class citizen in every country except home.

This is not only weird but indescribably unusual to me simply because I cannot fathom ever wanting to be disconnected in any way from my beautiful Dominica. I kid you not. It’s always fun and interesting to travel to different countries and observe cultures, try new things and see everything bigger and faster or smaller and better...as long as I can go home after.

I can say better because I’m not deluded; I am aware that in other countries the available options are so much more efficient and just cooler. That awareness also extends to me admitting that yes, it would be so great if my country had this or could do that but that’s it for me.  I’m still ok with mine. At the end of my visit- and believe me, I always look forward to the end- home is just irreplaceable to me.

I met a Dominican man recently who lives overseas. No sooner had we started talking than he went off on his tangent explaining to me, who he clearly considered the ignorant, small island girl, “how America works.”

I listened to him trying to impress upon me what pollen is and how a self-service gas station works and how easy it is to own a home and how he can change vehicles every year and the benefits of joining the army.

 He went on about how every little thing is illegal from throwing tossing litter out the vehicle window (go figure) to walking on the sidewalk (jaywalking as he put it.)

Eventually, he progressed, in his put-on American accent, to advise me on the best way to become a US citizen and the fastest way to become a resident. I stopped him. I barely listened to his spiel the entire time but from the moment this man assumed that I wanted what he had and what people like him think people like me want, he had lost me. I tore myself away from enjoying the scenery rushing by to explain to the poor, misinformed Dominican man that other countries are lovely on vacation and for limited periods of time to me but home is where my heart will always be. 

But no, he countered, how can Dominica compare to the great U S of A; the land veritably flowing with milk and honey. Well I reminded him of some of his earlier complaints about his new homeland which he acknowledged with a shrug and a “Me? I not American, nuh. Their country dat.” 

I asked, isn’t that what you swore when you took your oath to become a citizen? Hmm.

Anyway, I say all of this to make a point. The point is not to offend Caribbean people with dual citizenship or those living overseas. I understand that you must do what you must do to reach whatever goal you have set for yourself. I get that. 

My point is don’t ever delude yourself into thinking that different is always better. Do not let anybody convince you that because you come from a tiny island in the Caribbean Sea barely 30 years independent, that your home, your accent, your tastes, your upbringing, you style, your history, your culture is inferior. 

I will always say that it’s ok to go elsewhere are seek more opportunities. That’s admirable and we commend ambition but don’t look down on us because we choose to stay here and keep working to build our country. Don't forget, don't claim to be what you are not. Say what thou wilt, thou art Dominican. You're from here and you belong to us.