The Strongest Among Us

“Sometimes the strongest among us are the ones who smile through silent pain, cry behind closed doors and fight battles nobody knows about.”

-Unknown

Something about that statement and others like it speak so much to me.  Think of a person whom you consider strong and then try to imagine what their struggles might be, their fears, their weaknesses, their strongest desires. 

If you can’t, you’re not alone. It’s so much easier than to imagine these persons in their moments of weakness.

I’m not sure what this post is about but I just want to say two things.

One is a question. Why is it that some man will see a woman holding her own, not needing anything from him or anyone else and like it but at the same time, not wonder if she’s really ok?

I discovered that recently, not just in my own life. There are men out there who will be proud of a woman who never asks for anything and never seems to want for anything but will be so proud that they will feel no qualms about adding to her responsibilities or at least, not subtract from it.

Here’s how I see it: I can be rich or poor, emotionally stable or not. I will still seek any opportunity to prove myself equal or capable of taking care of myself. I will complain to myself and seek help from myself. I will pay my own way and comfort myself.

Everybody is okay with that- both others and myself.

The questions for me arise when the same person who is so proud of me will be so comfortable in my self-reliance that he will add himself to my list.

It’s true; I don’t complain to you and you don’t see me needing anything from you but does that mean that I ought to take care of you, too?

Do you never wonder how I do it? Do you never consider that I might need although I don’t say? 

I'm not asking you to help me; just don't add.

That brings me to number two.

You see me smiling all the time. Whenever you ask how I’m doing I always say fine. I’m not lying; I am fine, for real. The way I think is, as long as I am alive and I have my support system intact, no matter what happened today, there is always hope. 

I mean I may have a million bills but besides the bills, I also see that I still have a job and if I don’t I still have talents I can use or my support system. I’m ok, really.

Does that mean that I don’t have worries? Plans? Fears? Insecurities? Never. I’m just not complaining. 

Now because I’m not complaining, that doesn’t mean that I’m the perfect candidate to ONLY complain to. Yes, I’ll listen. Yes, I’ll care but just take a minute sometimes and be concerned about what’s holding me up. 

I may think of myself a lot but I think of others, too. All I want is to be considered as a human- a fragile one sometimes, too.