Have you ever walked into a room or stepped into a bus and observed twelve pairs of hostile eyes fixed on you? Guys will probably say no. Most likely, they will see someone they know and greet him and move on with their lives. A woman will say that that always happens.
Reader, a number of you will get excited about where I might be going with this but let me stop you forthwith, I'm not speaking to those people who see haters everywhere (whether real or imagined). Those females who are always tweeting and posting about people who envy them and are just dying to be them. In my humble opinion, if that's you, most probably nobody wants to be you. Maybe your hater is real and she actually has a reason to hate on you- maybe you're after something belonging to her. Maybe you deserve whatever you get. Moving on.
I know women who I want to hate on but I can't. They are those girls who have it all figured out. On their worst days, they look great while on my bad days, I look horrible. Everybody seems to be their friend and wish to bask in their glory. I have reason to hate on them, right? I cannot because they don't allow it.
I'll be brief this week because my rant this time is simple. There's a solution to THS. These women that I want to hate on, they've figured it out, they congratulate. I find that this works.
On one occasion, I met a hater. I saw her from a distance so I had the advantage of watching her measuring me from top to bottom looking for a flaw- lucky for me that was one of my rare good days. When she reached me, she hugged me as pretend-friends usually do and said, "You taking all your money to buy makeup? TV fool you!"
Obviously, reader, I could choose from a number of responses in the Dirty Responses Catalogue of My Mind but I said, "If I had perfect skin like you, I wouldn't have to. You looking so good girl! That bag is hot!"
And you know reader, it was genuine. I meant it, the bag was hot and her skin was ok. The situation was diffused. By picking out something about her that I liked, I was able to avoid THS.
Men are not blind to this phenomenon either. More than one guy has commented on it saying that THS is nothing more than petty. One person compared it to two girls realising that they are both with the same man and fighting over the one man while two men would part peacefully and with no hard feelings in the same situation. Incidentally, a man said that there is no loyalty among women. There's something to think about. We cannot mention feminism and gender equality when we act like hens squabbling over a leaf which we cannot eat anyway.
Too often, women miss out on good relationships and solidarity because of petty strife. We grieve ourselves because of envy when we can be sincerely happy for the other person. Help somebody else feel better about herself and you will find that you feel better about yourself for doing it. Its too stupid and immature to be the person on the bus staring and rolling your eyes at somebody that you don't know and have never seen just because the girl looks good and you like her hair! When you outgrow the tendency to minimise somebody else just to feel good, you will be pleased that you become one of those girls that somebody wants to hate on but cannot. And I guarantee that it works.
It's ok to compliment somebody else. Women like receiving it but we never think of giving it. Let it become second nature to you. Stop picking at tiny things and instead, be genuine. Don't fake it, mean what you say or don't say it. But it gets easier and more natural with practise.
THS is probably the dumbest syndrome ever but its real and it doesn't go away without action.
I expect haters of this article and that's fine, I also expect some readers to congratulate and that's fine as well. As long as you have an opinion.
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